I've been considering a call to the Permanent Diaconate for some time now. I'm married, so the Priesthood is out of the question, but I do feel that there is some call to something more ... involved ... with the Church.

I was an Altar server after my conversion in college, and even now serve as an EMHC at Mass for my parish.

Any tips from those who have also considered, started, started and quit, or started and were ordained into the Permanent Diaconate?

I am currently in formation for the Permanent Diaconate for my Diocese. If you feel called to this vocation, then I would schedule an appointment with your pastor to talk about it. You can also look around on the website for your diocese and see how they handle the formation process. It is not the same everywhere, but it is starting to become more uniform across the U.S. (some diocese like Wichita Kansas do not have a program at all). If your diocese is starting a program soon, then there should be informational meetings scheduled and I would recommend that you attend one of these. There is certainly no harm in gathering info and learning more about the process to see if you are really being called. Our program is six years long(counting the discernment phase) and we are scheduled for ordination (God willing) in spring 2022. Please feel free to post any questions here or private message me. I will be glad to help in any way that I can.

pray pray pray .... we do have one person on the board right now who has starting his course work for the permanent diaconate... his handle is arky

another member that only shows up infrequently that has completed his work and has been ordained is max kolbe

st brigid's husband is in the diaconate program and will be ordained in 2022

there are probably others... they are just not registering at this moment

oops... took too long... i see arky has already sniffed this thread out

I’ve been ordained and serving as a deacon for a bit over 15 months now. In our diocese, formation (and pre-formation) was basically a six year process. I was thinking and praying about it for several years before that.

A few things I would suggest considering:

God is calling you to something. I would take seriously that sense that God is calling you to something more. He is (always). That may or may not be diaconal ministry, and that’s OK. That’s part of what the formation process is there to help you discern. Having that pointed out to me early in the process was really helpful to me.

You don’t discern alone. You’re discerning God’s will, but so is the church, in the form of one’s own pastor and in the form of those responsible for formation and ultimately the bishop, and in the case of a married deacon, so is his wife. So if you haven’t already, at some point you’re going to need to talk to your wife and then, depending on how that goes, your pastor. You will need both of their support or you are not called to the diaconate. (Your wife will literally have to sign on the dotted line before you could be ordained.) You will also not get far down this road before you will need a spiritual director, if you don’t already have one. This is all a gift, because God in His providence will speak to you through all these lovely people too. And they will help you listen.

You don’t discern standing still. Sometimes we have the idea that we sit in a room and pray for long enough and the answer comes. That’s (partially) incorrect. Of course you have to sit quietly and pray. But then you go out and take a step and see where God is in that, and then you return to prayer and talk to Him about that. This is very helpful because it’s very concrete. You literally just take a small step. Maybe it’s that conversation with your wife or pastor. Maybe it’s asking your pastor if there’s another place you can help out — lector, visiting the sick and homebound, sacramental prep, RCIA, whatever. Note well, though: You’re not going into these things to find out if you’re good at them. That’s not the measure. If God is calling you to be a deacon, He will help you get better at them. You’re doing them to see where God is in them. For instance, do you have a sense of peace and joy with them, even if you are anxious or don't think you did very well?

You don’t have to be sure to start formation, and discerning takes as long as it takes. Discerning your call is part of what formation is for. For a great deal of formation, I wasn’t sure at all God was calling me to ordination, but I was sure He wanted me to continue in formation. That’s enough. (For some guys it’s different. I think one of the guys ordained with me knew before he walked into the first meeting of the Inquiry year.)

Don’t make decisions in crisis. Discernment and especially formation are full of challenges, both in the spiritual realm and the temporal realm. But the devil thrives on our agitation. Your discernment of God’s will will be clearer when you’re at peace.