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 Post subject: "When Christmas Comes" - Andrew Klavan
PostPosted: Thu Feb 17, 2022 2:47 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:13 am
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Location: Wisconsin
Religion: Roman Catholic
Half way through and at points I wanted to just leave it alone.

The first 1/3 feels like a Hallmark movie. The characters aren't well developed so it's hard to get into the murdered librarian who everyone thought was an angel.

When reading the dialog I keep asking myself "could I see people talking this way?"

About half way through the narrator just starts throwing jokes into the story. A narration style that wasn't there earlier on.

There are some good moments to the story... hopefully it gets better

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For who we are and what we'll be/ I'll sing your praise eternally/ the miles we've shared I'd trade but few/ they're the ones that kept me away from you.


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 Post subject: Re: "When Christmas Comes" - Andrew Klavan
PostPosted: Thu Feb 17, 2022 2:55 pm 
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Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2005 10:13 am
Posts: 1735
Location: Wisconsin
Religion: Roman Catholic
Here's an example...
two characters are outside of a department store window. Inside the window is a Christmas display with a robotic Santa Claus reaching in a bag and pulling out a present. But it's just the same box that he keeps doing this motion with.

Quote:
Winter chuckled. The Santa Claus in the window laughed. He lifted a present out of his sack, but damned if it wasn't the same present as the last one he had lifted out. The guy was in a rut.


Not only the humor is new but this type of breaking the fourth wall with a nod and a smirk towards the reader. None of this happened prior in the story (100+ pages prior).

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For who we are and what we'll be/ I'll sing your praise eternally/ the miles we've shared I'd trade but few/ they're the ones that kept me away from you.


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