Denise Dee wrote:
The fact that no responsible person who believes in the doctrine of "Only a few will be saved" would state this belief at the wake or funeral of a nonbeliever, shows that it is not the truth, because the truth is not something that needs to be hidden.
I am truly and deeply sorry for your loss. I've done my job long enough to know that no amount of condolences take away the pain. I've also done my job long enough to know that, in these times, celebration of your love (still present, no less) for the one you've lost and empathetic presence is truly helpful in times of grief. Sincerely, I've prayed for you and will do so as well.
As for your quoted statement above, I agree that no responsible person would make declarations regarding people's possible damnation in these times. Actually, I'd go further, and say that truly responsible people are even careful about making declarations regarding the dead being "in a better place." All that language tends to be little more than cliches people say who don't know what else to say. The truth is that in these moments, loving and empathetic presence and compassion is worth infinitely more than theological speculation.
I do not agree, however, that the inappropriateness of such statements at that time suggests that those statements are false. To take a real example from my own life, my wife's favorite grandfather died a few years back. She saw him just a day or two before he passed at it really shook her seeing him, as he was, hooked up to all the machines and gasping for breath. Not long after he died, she turned to me and with complete conviction told me that if I ever so much as touched a cigarette she would leave me then and there. Billy died of emphysema related directly to his smoking habits. His last two years were absolutely miserable.
Now, it is objectively true that had Billy not smoked, he almost certainly would not have died of emphysema at the time and in the matter that he did. It is equally true that, despite the truth of that statement, no responsible person would say to Billy as he was passing or to his family, "Well, let this be a lesson--this is what can happen when you smoke!" Such a statement, while objectively true, is cold and grossly inappropriate and entirely beside the point.
And so it is with those who might be damned. We do well to remember when we care for the grieving that it is not our place to make pronouncements, as if we were God, as to the condition of that person's soul. It's our job to laugh and cry with them, to share with them in their tears and memories, to be present, and to leave the rest to God. To
hope with sincerity regarding their salvation and ours. To
entrust them to a God of Love. To
rely on the mercies of that God. But we don't allow the impropriety of theological speculation at that particular moment to condemn theological speculation in and of itself or the fruits of that speculation.
So, again, I am sorry for your loss. May your friend's soul rest in peace. I don't know where she is. But God does, and I, for one, trust Him in these matters.
