What truth scares you? I know it scared me when i realized how much of my life i jad wasted to selfish self satisfing things. The fact that God doesn't send us to hell we do by our own free will was a relief. We have a choice here and now whether we follow Him or this worlds gods. If we follow this worlds gods, money, lust, power, recogntion, material we will forever be chained to that. If we follow Him, will will follow in love we will give and we will give all of ourselves for the benefit of others. We will praise and Love Him who created us. We will thank God for sacrificing the only thing pure enough to offset our sinful nature, His Son. We will WANT to show God our Love not HAVE to because we are afraid. If your afraid its faith that is lacking. Ask Him for faith it is a grace given by Him and if your heart is true HE WILL.

I think I'm afraid of spirituality.

I absolutely understand that ... you may feel you have to commit to the realm of the spirit either fully or completely walk away knowing what you are walking away from. We will always fall short but we get back up ask for help be sorry for what happened repair any damage we caused in our fall and try again. It seems to me you struggle with just the basics of a belief in God ... I wouldn't worry so much about orhodox or roman at this point as it seems you need to accept that Jesus was the son of God first. If that happens then you can take it to the next level. I think if you are truely open to God then you will find the truth and no longer fear anything other then fear that you miss an opportunity to help someone. True Catholics don't critize our protestant brothers and sisters and we pray we will be reunited till then we look to God for help through Jesus and for hardened souls the blessed Virgin Mary will help you to Jesus if asked. This i know first hand

Not sure if this is allowed but books you might want to read are mere christianity, 7 story mountain or be a man. Hope that helps

Thanks. I'm just glad to hear from somebody that has been down a similar path. I have "Mere Christianity" but now I will make myself read it.

Its really a good read probably the best for those struggling with Christianity. It comes from a man (C.S. Lewis who most remember from his fantasy books) that was an athiest like me(foward pg XIX) although I don't recall him sharing his conversion. You won't lose anything and at minimium you'll have a better understanding of Christianity. I was lucky and why I was given the road so clearly I can't say but I can say that I 100% now believe that God exisits and Jesus was his only Son, God's Sacrifice for our Sins and God did this because he loves us and we all really want to love him whether we know it or not but can't because of our sin our impurity which places a dark veil over ourselves and blots that love out until we forget He is even there.

Glad you are here Cloudydays, maybe even Sunnydays soon.
May God Bless You My Friend.

Bill